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Journal: Love & Selfish

How a conversation can change your entire life and shake your reality! I have a few of those heartbreaking conversations; my last one being not far ago: Saturday.

Let’s face it I was already pmsing and having a hard conversation made my life blurry and unreal for a few days. I’m still working on it to be completely honest.

I got home. Wanted comfort from someone that I can’t ask for comfort anymore. This is what happens when you are low in energy and you forget your habits and discipline. So I cried. Cried some more. I wanted to scream. (I really need to find a place where I can do some screaming therapy. I have 6 months worth of scream in me, or maybe years) But instead of texting or calling, I journaled.

The word that kept coming to my mind is selfish! How can people be selfish!

Selfishness is the root cause of all pains. It takes away the ability to be mindful towards the needs of others. 

You close your heart. Makes you think: Why should I change? Why should I cooperate? The I me become more important than others. This takes away the ability to observe, recognize and appreciate the love expressed by others. Hence love gets lost or overlooked. This results in depriving yourself and others of experiencing love.

When you see these stories pop up in your mind about a partner/friend/family, they aren’t true about others. It is merely an expression of your own inner pains and miseries. Speak it out in a safe space, express yourself, work it out with yourself and the person instead of using your pain to create more pain. More times than not, communication will help you solve your miseries. Communicate. If the way a person communicates does not suit you, tell them. Tell them exactly how you wish they expressed themselves while you are communicating on serious things

If you don’t, this causes carelessness and disturbed communication. Mutual respect gets lost. Respect is huge in a relationship, it is not something you want to lose.

Love becomes conditional and loses its charm and meaning. You can’t love sincerely.

Self growth is affected. Relationships are affected. 

It prevents you from being true to yourself. Create hostility and confusion in relationships. You struggle to nurture your own heart and that of others.

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